[ life.is.overrated ]

stop procrastinating.

2007-08-08T04:40:00.000+08:00

How I wish I could.

2 days to rehearsal & 5 days to convocation day!

Woohoo!

43things.com

2007-08-04T05:18:00.001+08:00

back with a vengence!

2007-08-04T03:39:00.000+08:00

A couple of random photos that Cik Amy found on the net. I find them extra amusing and erm.. interesting. It's by an artist called Ron Mueck. Enjoy!

p.s: you can find the originals here and here

small.

a new born baby.

from this angle, this fella looks a little bit like my ex boyfriend.

And here's a little something from cszar's Make Love Not War series.

the reversed missionary?

the standing?

woof woof?

p.p.s: the originals are here.

p.p.p.s: great to be back!

what was the question again?

2007-07-26T05:21:00.000+08:00

ask me again and this time, i promise to give you the answer.

what was it again about promises and rules?
right.

wow. it's been a year since...

2007-05-05T18:20:00.000+08:00

world press freedom day.

i should be in cm, having a good time. instead, i'm stuck here in my room, in front of my computer, struggling to get this fyp done for thursday's presentation & submission. *sigh*

i should be listening to artistic opinions on..erm..ermm..things, watching film screenings, learning how to 'diy activism' and watching wayang kadbod.

i should be rocking to peter brown, shanon 'ehem' shah and of course carburetor dung!

maybe i could swing over cm tomorrow eh? i could check out the bbb cultural group.. ooohh and of course mei chern & azmyl yunor! *sigh* if only!

i bet this year's wfd is even better than last year's.

p/to/the/s: wah. 1 tahun sudahhh. susah mo cayaaa!

google this & google that

2007-05-04T04:09:00.000+08:00

i don't want google to turn into another yahoo.
the simple interface works just fine.

i will always prefer this than this

a whole bunch of nothingness.

2007-05-01T05:50:00.000+08:00

update:

post prod is doing fine.
running out of harddisk space.
had to delete my entertainment folder.
sayonara & good riddance to my precious movies, mp3s, animes, tv series, mvs, ads collection.
*sigh*

one more week to go.
*se7en*

energy level is still at 100%, will be decreasing soon.

owh. watched 'the fountain' the other night.
aronofsky is a genius.
hugh jackman is brilliant and super duper hot.
rachel wiesz is as beautiful as ever.
and diana ambak is not supposed to watch any movies during this critical week.
darn it.

p/s: sangat mau itu secret recipe punya chocolate indulgence!

stopping the motion.

2007-04-30T06:53:00.000+08:00

i love stop motion.
gonna try claymation next.
just to see if i have enough patience and passion.
heh.
weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee yeeeeeepeeee!

note to self: dee, ur fyp is tvc, remember? not animation!

oohhhh. *eight*

ten.

2007-04-28T14:38:00.000+08:00

i am doing what i love.
this is what i enjoy doing.
i want to do this.
ever since my chermai days;
up to mmu.
this is what i want to be doing.

pre prod ==== 100%
prod ======= 90%
post ======= 10%

ten more days.

aiyoh. ape aku merepek nih?

vroom~ vroom~

2007-04-27T06:15:00.000+08:00

cube teka ini kereta apa?

patutnye saye sdg bace buku, wat revision.
ini mlm ade mid term xm.
instead, saye edit2 foto.
i really should learn to set my priorities straight.
*haih*

the green screen effect.

2007-04-26T09:01:00.000+08:00

this is me.
9-5 culture is not what i'm looking for.
art is fun.

improvise

2007-04-26T08:35:00.000+08:00

this is where i eat, sleep, work and play.
it is my mini studio.
my props storage.
my workstation.

for the next thirteen days,
this would be my world.
my only connection to the outside world;
the internet and the cellphone.

thirteen days.

listen!

2007-04-23T17:32:00.000+08:00

..to what others have to say

an open letter to an ex-bf #5

2007-04-23T08:39:00.000+08:00

Dearest ex-boyfriend:

This maybe a little bit too late for me to say this, but I do have to say it.

The world that both you and I live in is a small place. It may seem big, but believe you me, it isn’t. Remember when we used to hang out in the same crowd? Well I’m still in that crowd. The crowd that you were closed with is still very much my good friends. So maybe now you have found your own crowd. But keep this in mind: When you have moved on.. I’m still here with them. I stayed. You left.

I never thought you were the kiss-and-tell type. I should have figured that out when you talked about ex-gf#1 and current gf. What a fool I was. Ah. As for ‘maki ur gf’, excuse me Sir, I did not ‘maki’ her. All I ever did was asked her a few questions and told her some things that you already know. Again, I did not ‘maki’ her.

Remember when you said you didn’t like nosy people? ‘Hal kite, hal kite. Org laen tayah tau’. Wow did I fall for that! Silly me for feeling bad, blogging about us. About you. Heh.

Imagine how I felt when I found out that you talked about us. About ME.

Did you not think I would find out? Well yeah I’m months behind, but here I am, thinking about what you might have told people. If you had told the truth, I’m fine with it. But why did you have to twist things around? Why? What would you have gained from doing that?

I’m totally out of your life. There is no need for you to turn people against me.

We are already on different paths of our own separate lives. Let’s just hope we wouldn’t bump into each other in the future. Stay off Australia.

‘ku maafkan semua ini, walau tak ingin lagi ku melihatmu’

p.s: yes, i'm 25 yrs old n i only have 5exes. i'd like to keep it at that, thank you.

when things don't matter anymore.

2007-04-01T17:15:00.000+08:00

Single White Female. Have you ever watched that movie? OK. Creepy is the word. You know,when someone is doing the things you do, buying the things you buy. Things like that.

Seeing your friend transform into someone better (in fashion, personality etc.) is a good thing, ain't it? You're happy for her because she's not that boring little person she was when you first met her. But what would you do when suddenly you realized, she's slowly turning into you?

And things started to get a lot weirder (and a lot more creepy) when you analyze things. You didn't noticed the little things before, until someone pointed it out. Then you start to think 'OMG!' But you couldn't talk to her. Because she is in her own little world of herself. Besides, what is the point of talking to someone who would deny the whole thing?

Maybe you should see it from another point of view. Think of it as this way:

She wants to be you. There has to be a reason behind her wanting to be you.
You're kool. Hip. Happening. You have lots of friends. You have your own style.
You are everything that she is not.
She could buy the things that you want.
She could show it off to you all she want.
But you have to remember something.
YOU ARE ORIGINAL.
SHE IS A COPYCAT.
You talk, give ideas.
She agrees to you, support your ideas.
You're a leader.
She's a follower.
You have your friends.
She's their friend because of you.

You have a lot more to say, don't you?
Don't.
Because no matter what you say or do, she is not going to change. Besides, it will be over soon.
Keep it all together. Do whatever you have been doing. Be strong.
You have other friends. You don't need to talk to someone who would not even try to understand you.

*hugs*

when too much is too much.

2007-04-01T16:13:00.000+08:00

Everyone has a limit. When someone is pushed to the extreme, she would break.

Stress is clouding me these days. I need to sign up for a stress management class. A friend of mine, is doing a 'Stress Free Campaign' for his final year project. The whole class keeps saying 'stress? need help? go to Tuah. he's the cure to stress'. Sort of an inside joke for us. (Tuah=Luck)

Thesaurus came out with;
affliction, agony, alarm, albatross*, anxiety, apprehensiveness, burden, clutch, crunch, disquiet, disquietude, distention, draw, dread, expectancy, extension, fear, fearfulness, ferment, flutter, force, hardship, hassle, heat, impatience, intensity, misgiving, mistrust, nervous tension, nervousness, oppression, overextension, passion, protraction, pull, restlessness, spring, strain, stretch, tautness, tenseness, tension, tensity, tightness, traction, trauma, trepidation, trial, urgency, worry

for the synonym of Stress.

I feel you, Thesaurus.

I am in so much pressure, I could explode unexpectedly. Believe you me (maybe explode is an understatement?)

Today is Sunday. Good ol' Sunday. A day for relaxation, bumming around. Sleep. But no, today is not an ordinary Sunday. It's a Full-of-Stress Sunday. FoSS, for short.

Thursday is the first of two Judgement Days. The first submission; amount of boards to be submitted: SIXTEEN (minimum). SIX, of which are 20"x30" boards (storyboards/shooting boards/visual effects boards). TEN boards, A2 size (strategy boards/concept boards/scripting boards/floorplan board/front.sideviews board/perspective view board).

FoSS. FOUR more days to Judgement Day numero uno. THREE more days to Getting 'Em Printed Day. TWO days left to finish off FOURTEEN boards. FoSS.

Sleep?
What's that?

The 25-year-old baby

2007-03-21T01:12:00.000+09:00

It's 12.20am, 21st of March 2007 and I am 25 years old today.

My first 'official' birthday wish was from The Fella. He called me up at 10 to 12 and straight away sang me a birthday song. So I told him 'wei! gila ape? lom kol 12 la' So we talked for a little then he sang me another birthday song. Suddenly, he said 'eh..aku nk nyanyi 25 kali la. sempena umo ko yg dh tua'. And so he did. I had to listen to his 'unique' singing voice for almost 5minutes. I lost count of how many times he sang the words 'happy birthday to you'. I was just laughing and praying so that the lightning won't strike me (it was heavily raining here in Cyberjaya).

Then I received lots of phone calls, SMSes and IM birthday wishes. My housemate Bob planned to throw me some eggs but I caught him in the act. All he said was 'its only 12am. dee, i got all day'. Damn. I enjoyed throwing eggs+flour to birthday boys/girls so much, that I forgot sooner or later it's going to be my birthday. Hehe.

I don't think I'd be celebrating my 25th. I've been really busy. Seminars and FYP (and DotA) Owh well. As they say 'age is only a number'. Right. *sigh*

Happy 25th Birthday Diana Ambak.
Cheers to life.

*I don't feel like I'm 25 years old.

the dead.

2007-03-08T07:08:00.000+09:00

How awful is it to forget a very important date?

He would have been 34 years old.

*the worst sister ever.

soon to be 25 and hating it.

2007-03-06T03:33:00.000+09:00

look ma, i'm depressed!

In less than two weeks, I'll be 25 years old. Imagine that. Phew! 25 years old. Why don't I feel like I'm 25 years old? 25 years old. Heh.

I don't look like I'm 25 years old. I don't feel like I'm 25 years old. I sure don't act like I'm 25 years old. So why is it in less than two weeks' time, I'll be 25 years old? *sigh*

I have been doing a lot of serious thinking this past few months. Adult thinking. At almost 25 years old, I haven't achieved much. Correction: I haven't achieved anything. Not a single thing. Nada. I'm still studying, and will still be continuing my studies even after my bachelor's degree. I have never worked in my entire life (except for the post-SPM gig I did). I am still begging for money from my ever-loving parents. Plus, I'm single (but not available). *double+sigh*

I have no clue of being a 25-year-old woman. I'm clueless. I'm horrible as an adult. I have made countless bad decisions. One after the other. I don't deserve this. I can't be 25 years old. I'm not ready. It's not my time to be 25 years old. I DON'T WANT TO BE 25 YEARS OLD.

Can I be 5 again? Innocence is so sweet. Adult life is ugly, with all its politics and selfishness. I DON"T WANT TO BE 25 YEARS OLD.

*sigh*

the cheeks of the butt

2007-02-28T10:02:00.000+09:00

Diana: Cultural Learnings of Singapore for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Malaysia.
(Director's cut version includes the unedited version of the hotel scene)

Martin Scorsese

2007-02-28T08:49:00.000+09:00

I find it funny when Mr Scorsese won his first Oscar ever with the film The Departed. Don't get me wrong. I'm glad he won. He had been denied of his Oscar for years. If you ask me, I think he should have already won a few Oscars. Especially for Goodfellas and Gangs of New York.

But an Oscar for The Departed? It's not even an original piece. OK maybe he did an excellent job in directing the film. I loved the cinematography and the editing (I didn't know the editor was a woman until I watched the Oscars..not to mention an ehem old woman...heeeeeeee :D) I enjoyed the film. I was excited and thrilled throughout the whole film. The anticipation was not because of the film itself...I just couldn't wait for the ending. To see how would William Monahan cramp three excellent films into one.

Maybe I am biased because I watched and loved all three of Infernal Affairs. Owh well.

I'm glad he won. He's getting older and older. I hope the academy wouldn't wait for another 40 years to Oscarized Mr Martin Scorsese :D

p.s: Leonardo Dicaprio owes Scorsese big time. The man practically revived his acting career. Don't you think so?

I'm mad about 'em movies!

how on earth am i supposed to bring you back to malaysia? can't the academy just give me the small miniature or a replica of the oscar? (gosh! it rhymed!) har har har

life; as we know it.

2007-02-24T07:15:00.000+09:00

"perfer et obdura; dolor hic tibi proderit olim"

I am free.

I have finally stopped caring. I can't afford to give anymore chances to those who are unable to make use of the chances and the privileges I gave them. Why did I even bother? So be it.

A couple more months (touch wood, fingers crossed) and I'm out of here.

I am extremely thrilled to start a new life far far away from here.

Life; as we know it, is whatever we make out of it. Live life. No matter how we look at it, be it the best, the worst, or something in between, we will all end up dead. Enjoy life, or sulk and complain if that is your choice, so be it. As cliche as it may sound, it is by the way, your life.

No, this is not good bye. It is just the beginning.

'aut viam inveniam aut faciam'

thaipusam.

2007-02-03T06:14:00.000+09:00

went to batu caves on thurs. whoa! felt like i was in india. we took the ktm train, adding to the india experience. hehe.

(will update later with pictures)

p.s: my notebook is dying.

it ain't backstabbin'

2007-01-29T02:55:00.000+09:00

edited: feb 23rd.

settled.

renewed.

2007-01-29T02:21:00.000+09:00

today.

whoa. the semester break just ended. 18 days well spent. (not really)

i spent most of the days with my family. chilling out at home with my family was just what i needed after the extremely stressful semester. jazzmeen, the eldest of my 3 insanely adorable nieces is in a kindergarden now. allyanna, the second is in pre-school. i love how she pronounced 'x' as 'esh'. hehe. comelnye!! awww. how time flies! i'm an old aunt! old, but wayyyy kool. :D

my plan to join hatem san in sabah was cancelled as my friends decided to go to a 'out-of-this-world waterfall'. out of this world it was (not). it was the suckiest road trip ever! divas surrounded me all over. pah! i'm not much of a jungle-girl myself, but come on! where do you think a waterfall is? in the middle of the city? ngok ngek!

let's see. what else.

ah. bestfriend #3 dumped her loser boyfriend. about time! she's better off without him. bestfriend #2 is now bestfriend #1. i better bLitch about this. laters!

owh. darn. how could this slipped my mind? things happened for reasons. and the (great) reason for what happened was, amy is now a proud owner of a compaq notebook! *clap*clap* (now the whole house is pc-less)

so here i am. back in cyber-phuckin-jaya. 1 more semester to go. 4 more gruelling months and i'm outta here (fingers crossed, touch wood). i have absolutely no idea how i am going to go through this final months in mmu. no idea whatsoever how i am going to prepare myself for fyp2. no idea whatsoever.

tomorrow is a brand new semester. the final semester.

wish me luck.

p.s: seniors, welcome back.

goodbye for now.

2007-01-10T11:24:00.000+09:00

goodbye for now.

happy holidays!

jumpa di semester akhir ya!

vintage.

2007-01-10T10:36:00.000+09:00

gotta love your jack purcell.

trimas boxer red karer!
:D

i'm vintage. you're high maintenance. can't wait to see you fall.

weirdest bday party ever!

2007-01-10T10:12:00.000+09:00

we made history last night. we actually had a birthday party minus the birthday girl. heh. we bought her a baby tee- by her fav brand levi's, bought a secret recipe cake for her (americano; like what mimi said 'mkn kek je.. x bermaksud kite pro america' hehe) and of course, had a birthday party for her.

birthday girl was bz celebrating with her family. plans got mixed up, so there we were, a birthday party, birthday-girl-less. i took photos of the cake and mms-ed it to her. just for the fun of it. we texted her n said 'this is what u're missing. ktorg mkn kek ko' or something like that. we even called her up. hehe. she was very the terkejut okay.

the guys left around 7am this morning. sent off hatem n friends to lcct. hatem's leaving for kota kinabalu, sabah. he went there with his friends. maybe my friends n i will join him later this week. i dunno. we'll see.

anyways, last night was fun. it would've been fun-ner if the birthday girl was there, but hey..family comes first.

'ofey, kamu sudah suku abad ya!'

happy 25th birthday dearie ofey. we love you! *hugs*kisses*

glory.glory.

2007-01-08T02:21:00.000+09:00

obsessed.

2007-01-06T22:52:00.000+09:00

i'm currently obsessed with this guy.

'isn't life a series of images that change as they repeat themselves?'
'people need to be made more aware of the need to work at learning how to live because life is so quick and sometimes it goes away too quickly'
'they always say that time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself'

genius.

*photo from google. edited by yours truly.

6 days after.

2007-01-06T18:35:00.000+09:00

it's not too late to wish everyone a happy 2007, is it?
bukak buku baru.

p/s: don't say things you don't mean. don't make promises you can't keep. 2007: a new beginning.
note to self: don't make the same mistake twice.

the aftermath.

2007-01-05T19:34:00.000+09:00

yeah. my desktop screenshot. serabut.
time for spring cleaning.
end of semester!
au revoir trimester 2!

i don't wanna stay for another year in mmu. i sucked big time during the exam. !die

cheat codes

2007-01-05T10:30:00.000+09:00

final exam in 5 hours' time!

wish me luck!

what's up?

2007-01-02T04:52:00.000+09:00

i'm 25 years old this year. in 79 days, i'll be 25 freaking years old! omg! a quarter to a century. omg i'm ancient!

things i've got to do before i turn 25:

bungee jump!
road trip!

omg. 79 days.

an anthem for every clueless 25year-old-girl (i refuse to grow up)

4 Non Blondes
What's Up

25 years and my life is still
I'm trying to get up that
great big hill of hope
For a destination
I realized
quickly when I knew I should
that the world was made up of
this brotherhood of man
for whatever that means
And so
I cry sometimes when I'm lying in bed
Just to get it
all out what's in my head
And I am feeling a little
peculiar
And so I wake in the morning and I step outside
And I take a deep breath
And I get real high
And I
scream from the top of my lungs
What's goin'
on
And I say, hey hey hey hey
I say hey, what's
going on?
And I say, hey hey hey hey
I say hey,
what's going on?
ooh, ooh ooh...
And I try, oh my
God do I try
I try all the time in this institution
And I pray, oh my God do I pray
I pray every single day
for a revolution
And so I cry sometimes when I'm lying
in bed
Just to get it all out what's in my head
And I am feeling a little peculiar
And so I wake in the
morning and I step outside
And I take a deep breath
Then I get real high
And I scream from the top of my
lungs
what's goin' on
And I say, hey hey hey
hey
I say hey, what's going on?
And I say, hey
hey hey hey
I say hey, what's going on...
25
years and my life is still
I'm trying to get up that
great big hill of hope
For a destination.

countdown.

2007-01-02T02:03:00.000+09:00

one more week to go. four more days of suffering and sleepless nights. come saturday, i'll be a free girl.

wednesday: thesis submission
wednesday: 3d maya final submission
thursday: fyp1 final submission
friday: final exam - 3d maya

omg. i can't wait for this week to be over!

p/s: happy new year everyone!

rebranding.

2006-12-30T09:29:00.000+09:00

16 days of silence. a personal best, i must say. thank you dearest streamyx. i love the services that you offer. you're the best. seriously, you are. 1 gold ribbon for you.

30th december 2007. wow. in a few days, it'll be 2007. 2006 came and went. 2006, a year of..uhm..surprises. wait a sec. let's do this yearly round up thingy tomorrow. for now, i feel like blitching. (that's blog bitching, for those who don't know)

the past few weeks was like..hell. i'm bz with work every single day. need.air. is this how 'the real world' a.k.a feels like? if it is, well, i'm not looking forward for it. i can't be working 24/7. i can't.

ark. i'm supposed to be blitching. here goes.

a few months ago, i chose silverfishbooks as my 'subject matter'. you know, for my final year project. and for the fyp, i'm supposed to do 3 things.

1. tvc (major)
2. website (minor)
3. environmental media (minor. and it's 3d, in case, you've never heard of the term)

for this semester, i chose website. it's not the best website in the world, but it's a lot better that the original, don't you think? owh. it's not done yet. jan 4th's the dateline. and i 'tweaked' the target audience. 15years old-25years old. (only 2/53 people this age have ever heard of silverfishbooks) anyways, here's a screen capture.

what i'm trying to say here is that, when i went to silverfish books a couple of months ago, to ask questions regarding the company, (because that's what final year students do) the man behind the counter, was very... how should i put it in a polite way..uhm.. bad mannered. yeah. i don't want to go into details, but he treated me like i was..uhm.. some sort of a disease? like, i was there sent by the government to burn his books or something.

somebody who is sort of close to the man told me that the man is actually a nice person. that most probably he treated me the way he did because i was rude. owh well. everybody is entitled to have their own opinion. and my opinion is:

"dear sir behind the counter. i'm not rich. i don't live in bangsar. i don't go clubbing in telawi. my english isn't perfect. i don't own a bmw. i'm only an advertising student trying to get my bachelor's degree. must you be so rude? weren't you (no matter how old you are) once a student? please dear sir. we students are human beings as well."

p.s: dear sir behind the counter, your website sucks. but your anthologies kick ass, thank God for that. i don't owe you, you owe me cos i bought your books.

!doc

2006-12-14T04:24:00.000+09:00

The Young Independent Documentary Filmmaker Award
Launches on December 14

Time: 8:00pm – 10:30pm
Venue: Auditorium, Selangor Chinese Assembly Hall

Program Schedule
7:30pm Admission
8:00pm Press Conference and video showcase
8:30pm Independent filmmakers Jeremiah Foo and Ong Julin sharing their experiences
10:00pm Question and Answer (Q&A)
10:30pm Closing

FOR ENQUIRIES:
Please contact the Y4C Secretariat Office at 03-77831164
or Khai Loon (013-3970519) and Yee Ling (012-7355025)
or email to y4c2006@gmail.com

the ungrateful me

2006-12-14T04:18:00.000+09:00

it really hurts when someone that you look up to and admire labels you as 'ungrateful'.

*sob*

can this week be any worst?

low-res

2006-12-13T13:25:00.000+09:00

i still have his folders in my laptop. i still keep his emails. i still have his things.

now tell me. what should i do with them? delete delete throw away? or keep keep keep?

it's gonna be 2007 soon. i can't be stucked in 2004/2005/2006. gotta move on. azam tahun baru is not to have any azam. heh ( i dunno why i even bother having new years resolutions *sigh*)

p.s: its only wednesday. two more days without sleep. can i survive?

sarawakians do it better.

b/g musika!

2006-12-12T04:36:00.000+09:00

i know.

sometimes it's freakin annoying browsing pages with background music. it keeps on looping and after a few minutes, you get very worked up.

but at this moment, i am so in love with this song. i like this version way better than corinne bailey rae's original. maybe it's because of the kick-ass live performance by toni, master.jerry and ms.eli the other night? (and not to mention i luv the sound of acoustic guitars) *dreamy*

so here it is. artisatwerk's bg song of the moment.

credits to master.sam's podcast

aint's she adorable?

2006-12-10T13:48:00.000+09:00

watch this.

i dare to dream.

2006-12-10T12:29:00.000+09:00

Merge this. Merge that. Seems like they are very successful in merging things. But wait a minute. They failed in 'merging' what matters most. The rakyat.

I hate it when I start to think about Malaysia's future. I’ve final year project and assignments to do for God’s sake! Gotta stop thinking about something that may not change for the next 100 years.

masquerader

2006-12-10T10:54:00.000+09:00

a coward deserves a coward(ess)

coward(ess)\:

a pretentious bitch whom;
[i] wouldn't pick up your phone call
[ii] would pick up your phone call only after you threatened her
[iii] only dares to 'speak' to you through ym's status
[iv] wouldn't look you in the eyes when you bumped into her
[v] deleted her blog after a so-called misunderstanding
[vi] signed as 'anonymous'
[vii] copies other people's style of writing
[viii] calls herself 'deedaa'

face it. she's the only da, i'm the only dee. n u r?

case of the ex

2006-12-10T10:10:00.000+09:00

A few days ago, I chatted with (the) ex number 1. Been talking a lot with her lately. She’s.. nice. I know some of you might think ‘Yeah, right’, and yes, I did say ‘I fucking hate her’ earlier this year.

You see, when you’ve been talking (and listening) to the wrong people (i.e boyfriend who has every motive there is to make you ‘not like’ a particular person) you tend to ‘not like’ the person. Get it? No? Never mind.

He had his motives, which I wouldn’t ever bother discussing (cause it’s a waste of time anyways). Somehow, I did ‘not like’ her. But that was then. This is now.

So she made a mistake by not removing her link when she left a comment on his fotopages. So she copied and pasted their YM conversation. So? She asked a simple question. Plain ol` Yes or No. Him being him, can’t give a straight answer. So she was a little bit rude, intruding his precious ‘alone’ time (alone my ass). So? She’s his ex, she has the right to do what she did. After all, they have been together for the longest time.

Can’t he respect her? He used to tell me ‘She doesn’t respect me’. (Now I wonder, did he talk about me that way to the new girlfriend?) Is he respecting her by not answering her questions? Or can’t he at least give a straight answer of Yes or No?

What was he doing ‘patrolling’ around her place? He must’ve been ‘Oh fuck! She didn't see me, did she?’ (Owh wait, he's not the swearing type, I am) when he saw her. Kantoi big time, dude. You didn’t expect to find her outside of her home, did you? (Makes me wonder, did you did a round at my place? Owh wait, you wouldn’t do that, I was just a pit stop. I didn't matter)

Miss ‘Yang lepas tuh, sudahla’ isn’t too passive for you, is she? You chose her, so you better stick with her. (Until she realizes that you’re such a bore and moves on to another guy whom she ‘Saya Awak’ with)

Urgh. I don’t hate you. Sometimes you’re just so immature and full of it. Have fun with the new girl. Let’s see if you’re getting any from that pretentious bitch.

tai.yang.yue

2006-12-10T08:17:00.000+09:00

A couple of months ago, I noticed the ‘Rain Dogs’ poster at GSC OU. I said to myself ‘I gotta watch this film!’ and then I totally forgot about it. Typical me.

After nearly 8 hours in front of my laptop (browsing the internet, of course) I came across Ho Yuhang’s name. And I was like ‘I’ve heard of this name before. But where? Hmm..’

So I googled. There. ‘Rain Dogs’. I gotta watch Rain Dogs.

Note to self: Check whether Rain Dogs is playing anywhere. Err..it’s not? What about DVD? What about pirated DVD? Erk. Can’t do that. Gotta support the local indie films.

Note to self part 2.0: Should I watch Cinta?

it's 6.41am

2006-12-10T07:38:00.000+09:00

nice.

suaram dinner 2006

2006-12-10T06:00:00.000+09:00

the night was for them

shanon + azmyl

i wanted these. but someone else won them. dang!

entering: bollywood land

p.s: azmyl yunor rocks!

upgrade

2006-12-10T04:37:00.000+09:00

i just switched to blogger beta.

let's see how it works.

owh. it can't be undone.

sweet.

updated 4am:

so what are the 'label' for? i thought it was going to be like wordpress? so it's not ay? what's it for then?

yay!

2006-12-06T09:33:00.000+09:00

ana baizura's surprise birthday party
(29-30/11/2006)

finally! a photo uploaded!

you didn't have a clue, did you girl? :D
'kenape gelap nih?'
hehe..gelap cos ktorg nk surprisekan ana lerrr!!

THREE surprises in one night. cukup kan? :D

sayang kat ana! sharing is caring, kan?

*hugs*kisses*

!survey

2006-12-06T02:39:00.000+09:00

heya guys! i need a favour. can you please help me filling out this survey? it's for my final year project.

you can click here.

thanks a lot!

published.

2006-12-05T21:33:00.000+09:00

So I told her. No more secrets.

Pulang paku, I said. Tried my best to convince myself it’s the best thing to do. It’s the right thing to do. But somehow, it didn’t feel right. I felt…guilty. I betrayed his trust.

But isn’t that what I’m supposed to do? After he betrayed me? I’m supposed to do this, right? *sigh*

I’m confused. Torn, between loving and hating. I can’t bring myself into hating him. But I can’t love him forever.

So what am I supposed to do now?

Weep and cry?

Kick and punch?

Or simply live?

heck.tick!

2006-12-05T17:28:00.000+09:00

i'm buried with work! fyp/thesis/maya/freelance. omg!

!die

can life be any more hectic than this?

to make things worst, i can't access any of my email accounts. i'm screwed!

i guess it can get worst.
!die

true or false?

2006-12-02T12:40:00.000+08:00

is it true what they said?

..originality died 40 years ago.

(?)

busker.musker. susker?

2006-12-02T01:36:00.000+08:00

busking?

come on! let's hold hands and walk together.

wanna go?

upload? what's that?

2006-12-02T01:31:00.000+08:00

fuck it.

i can't upload any pictures here.

i seriously need to get my own domain.

seriously.

animal planet: The Crane

2006-11-29T02:31:00.000+08:00

I feel like saying this.

You. Are. The. Man! I have never known a man that has your unusual characteristics. Good unusual, not bad unusual. You are a gentleman. The kindest of the kindest. Le Crème de le crème. You are as good as it gets.

Hell no, you’re not perfect :p (jgn plak perasan okay?). But you are almost perfect. Dude, I am super duper grateful to have the honour of knowing you.

There. I’ve said it.

*phew*

Eh? Do I need your girl’s permission to say this out loud?

:p

hatem san

2006-11-29T01:56:00.000+08:00

there.

anonymously fucked up

2006-11-28T02:13:00.000+08:00

It’s starting again.

Anonymous.

I fucking hate those anon who are fucking terrified of signing their names in cyberspace. Aren’t you proud of yourselves? I mean, are you so goddamned embarrassed of yourselves that you wouldn’t admit that you're you?

You’re the lowest of low, you know that? An ass peddler. You’re soooo dull and dry that you couldn’t even think of a single pseudonym. Yeah, that’s what you are. You’re dry. Dry Dry Dry Dry.

Here’s my middle finger straight at your fucking dork face, you fucking gutless slime ball.

Keep it coming, you disastrous wuss. I’m enjoying this.

Ngentot loe, otak memek!

kekadang!

2006-11-27T23:20:00.000+08:00

Kekadang susah kan bile kite berkawan? Macam, kekadang tuh kite geram sangat kat kengkawan, tapi kite takleh nak wat aper. Nak marah, takleh. Nak tegur takleh. Itu takleh. Ini takleh.

Kekadang bende paling kecik pun bole buat gaduh. Ape lagi kalo kite tau kawan kite tuh buat macam-macam alasan kat kite. Susah sangat ke nak berterus terang? Bukannye melibatkan hal-hal perasaan ke, emosi ke, keluarga ke.

Kekadang rase macam geram sangat. Rase sangat macam nak menjerit kuat-kuat. Tapi ini bukan soal marah-marah ke soal tanak bagitau ke ataupun ape-ape je la yang remeh. Tapi soal prinsip. Susah, bile kite ade prinsip dan kawan kite tak paham prinsip kite tuh.

Bile kite baik kat orang tuh, kite harapkan orang tu akan buat benda yang same kat kite. Karma. Senang je. Kalo kite asyik harapkan orang je baik kat kite, memang tak jalan la.

Taktau la. Betol ke ape yang saye buat nih?

Salu kene ingat. K-A-R-M-A. Karma.

go away

2006-11-27T20:23:00.000+08:00

I don’t need you. You’re a disaster.

Whenever you’re around, my life goes chaotic. Seriously, I don’t need you. Especially now, when everyone and everything demands something from me.

Urgh.

I don’t need this.

Next, please?

summarizing de summary

2006-11-27T08:25:00.000+08:00

Yes, I am back!. If you are wondering what I have been doing for the past (missing) months, well, here’s a summary. ( If you don’t wanna know, well, you can simply move along)

1. I’ve moved out.

Yes I have. Gone from the Townhouse. Buhbye room! Buhbye housemates from hell! Buhbye weed stock! Eh? Strike that. Gosh. That house, that room, that bed(!!), that everything. Full of memories. It’s kinda sad to move on, but in the same time, it’s good for me. Change of environment is what I need, right?

Cleaning up the room that I have stayed in since a year ago was depressing. That room meant so much for me. It was in that room where I, we, and our friends had so much fun. Most of our good friends had been in our room, and some even had crashed in for a few nights. I had great laughs and depressing moments in there. Heh. I guess, the magic won’t ever happen in there again. At least not for me.

Tq genks for the tolong menolong.

2. Moved into a new place (obviously)

Yeah. I moved into my friends’ place in Cyberia Condo B. It’s a little bit confusing now. We have two Amys now. Heh. Plus another Bob. Bob who isn’t a bob. Rare, but it does happens. Hehe. So here we are. Four housemates living together. 3 Sarawakians and a Kedah-an. Hahaha. Ehem.

I sure do hope everybody’s gonna be happy with this new place of ours. The HQ for De Genk has moved, but De Genk is still the same. Owh I forgot. De Genk minus one. He crossed over to the Lame side.

3. Cramped 19 cdt hrs into an eight-week semester.
Extreme, I know. But I had to.

4. Cope with the awkwardness (sort of)
Well, I didn’t run away.

5. Networking
:D Yes, I did.

6. Movies+movies+movies+movies
Well..

7. Lodged a police report
Haha. Amy, Joen and yours truly went to BP Cyberjaya to file a report against our ex housemates, Amrou (originally from Syria) and Alianna (from Bangsar, but thinks she’s from America). The copy of the report is with Joen. I’ll try to scan it and upload it here. Heeeee….

8. By-the-roadside-under-the-scroching-heat-confrontation
Phew! Never again!

9. A series of karaoke-ing + open houses + makan+makan again
It was hard work, you know?

10. Books galore!
Books-shopping-spree! Kinokuniya is selling their old graphic books stocks. Half price! or even 70% off the normal price. But most of the books are crap. Strike that. The contents were crappish (is that even a word?). You gotta be extremely patient and calm while browing the books. Heh. And at Borders, there's this Flash Frames book selling at Rm17.90! It was published in 2002, but who cares? I love beautiful books! They're so....beautiful.

Kino, Bordy, please gimme discounts on your Lonely Planet books. Please Please Please!

11. Back online!
Finally! Our streamyx is connected! Hah! Took them TWO weeks! TWO PHREAKING WEEKS! Uargh!

So that was it. My missing moments.

Owh. I did a little bit of crying. While watching a movie. Hah!

and i quote..

2006-11-27T07:02:00.000+08:00

my favourite band said it all. ya know..sometimes i feel the lyrics of certain songs just..speak right to me. it's like, whatever crap that i'm going through, someone somewhere is feeling exactly the way i feel. spooky.

'love hurts,
but sometimes it's a good hurt'

'sometimes when i'm alone i wonder
is there a spell that i'm under
keeping me from seeing the real thing'

buy the album, go get it, grab it fast. in stores now. Light Grenades.

community service!

2006-11-27T04:23:00.000+08:00

makan.
(picture taken somewhere in Ipoh, not too long ago)

Suaram Dinner 2006
A Tribute to Human Rights Defenders

8th Dec 2006
7.30pm - 10.30pm
Dewan Peladang, Jalan Templer,
Petaling Jaya.

Suaram is pleased to inform you that we will be organizing the event above in conjunction with the International Human Rights Day 2006, to pay tribute and honor those who relentlessly and fearlessly fight for and defend human rights in Malaysia as well as to help raise funds for our human rights work.

Programme for the night includes:
Suaram Annual Human Rights Award,
Special Address by Said Zahari
(Former Editor In Chief of Utusan Melayu),
Special Performance by Shanon Shah
(Best Male Vocalist AIM ’06),
and more…

Your support will help ensure the continuity of our human rights work such as public educational and training programmes, human rights campaigns, urgent appeals, documentation and monitoring of human rights violations, etc.

With your support, victims of oppression and human rights abuse no longer need to stand alone.

For ticket enquiries, or to make public donations, please call us at 03-77843525 or email us at suaram(at)suaram.net

See you there.

Thank you.

Make yourselves available!

the opposite of succubi

2006-11-27T03:46:00.000+08:00

For those who are still clueless (not to mention ignorant):

\:incubus: A male demon who would visit women at night and engage in sexual activity

(sounds like an ex boyfriend)

Let's reverse roles and let me be the succubi.

Interesting(?)

Get your Light Grenades.

paranoid.android

2006-11-23T17:30:00.000+08:00

Owh gosh.

I knew it would be awkward. This, however, is unbearable. I’m not a coward you know? I have never been a coward my entire life, except for this one. On this matter, I am a coward.

Weird, ain’t it? I have never been in this position before. Coward. Scared. Terrified! There are countless of negative words to describe me in this situation. I hate them all.

Hmm. I can’t avoid this forever, can I? I’m an adult, I’m expected to face this ‘crisis’ like one, right? Yeah.

But how do I do it? Get down on my knees and pray? Wait for a shooting star and make a wish? Cross my fingers? *sigh*

Should I…? or should I give myself some more ‘me’ time? It’s not too soon, is it? Will I be backstabbing myself or my whatever principles that I may or may not have? Whatever. *sheesh* Is that even possible? Urgh. What? Hah.

Maybe I should. Christmas and New Year is just around the corner. Maybe it’s time for a change. Revolutionize myself. Transform myself. Ah. That reminds me, the Transformers will be out next year. I saw the freaking teaser when I went to watch Death Note. Damned, is whoever created the teaser concept. Watching a teaser is like sexual intercourse, minus the climax. Eh? Where was I?

Owh. Maybe I should.

Yeah.

Yeah, I miss you too. But I can’t. You, of all people, should know that.

Two wrongs don't make a right.

nu bhlog!

2006-11-20T02:56:00.000+08:00

yet another blog!

:p

feelin` good

2006-11-20T02:05:00.000+08:00

life has been treating me extra nice these past few weeks.

i'm feeling good.

on the road.

2006-11-06T03:14:00.000+08:00

wow.

hollywood is planning to turn the novel 'on the road' by jack kerouac into a movie.

please please please do not suck.

and he said..

2006-11-06T02:13:00.000+08:00

"Long live the people and death to their enemies. Long live the glorious nation, and death to its enemies!"

convicted and sentenced to death.

propaganda (?)

heel tonne

2006-11-06T01:54:00.000+08:00

the not so glamorous hilton signboard.
(on the way to hilton batang ai longhouse resort, sarawak)

velkam bek!

2006-11-05T23:18:00.000+08:00

saturday was fun, fun, fun!

we met up with yee ling and khai loon of the y4c at asia247's penthouse and talked about the 'young filmmaker award' (which has been revamped to independent documentary award). looks like now i have some extra design works to do besides the design works for my final year project. owh well.

we were being used again by the two masters. this time we were extras in their streamyx mv. it was fun (tq mr director for the free vintage yellow shirt). totally the opposite of our first year mv production. urgh. let's not get into that.

later that night we were supposed to attend the hitz blitz gig at sunway. we decided not to go after we were almost caught in the heavy traffic jam. phew! went all the way back to bsc for dinner. the actors studio were tempting, fortunately, we managed to steer away.

next stop was cineleisure. owh god! i am so in love with that place! it's still new and there are only few shops open but it is.the.bomb! tiada lagi dating di gsc ou or gsc midvalley or tgv mines. akan ku dating selalu di cathay cineplex, cineleisure!

speaking of movies, frostbite a.k.a gigitan sejuk pontianak, was hilarious. heh. next movie: death note

i/o is next week. kengkawan; be prepared.

owh well!

2006-10-16T16:51:00.000+08:00

cuti nya sudah seminggu yah. and what have i done during the past week?

1. sleep
2. some more sleep
3. took the kids everywhere they wanted (the park, the amusement park, the swimming pool, kfcs, mcds, pizza huts, their cousins' place)
4. shopping with mommy dearest
5. shopping with sis dearest
6. sleep
7. paint my room dark green
8. re-paint my room dark red
9. re-arrange my room (an on going process)
10. tagged along my dad to his favorite 'casino'
11. sleep
12. anime marathon with the kids
13. infernal affairs marathon + the departed
14. sleep

owh. and i ate a lot too. mom's cooking. nothing beats it.

wow. i did all that in a week? buley tahan juga yah?

*hugs* to the one i missed the most.

it's a wrap!

2006-10-08T20:58:00.000+08:00

say ta ta to semester one!

here i am in klia, anxious to go home..and i'm in browsing the internet. har.har.har. it's not like there's no internet connection back home. what lar!

***

we drove to all the way to ipoh yesterday. heh. it was a spontaneous thing. amy and i didn't have anything to do during the weekend so we decided to tag along the two masters and aisan to ipoh. ipoh was fun. but the climbing up the cave wasn't. master.sam is such a nature boy...hiking/climbing is soooo his thing. me? my legs almost gave up on me. and no, dear sir, i am not spoilt. hiking just isn't my thing.

arkk! i totally forgot about the pictures! i left them at home...cyber home, not kuching home. darn it! note to self: remind amy to upload the pics

***

master.jerry told me he could get all the freddy krueger movies. yay! so the krueger marathon is still on! once i get back to cyber lar.

owh. i still haven't blog about my bali trip, have i? well, lemme notepad it first and once i get everything sorted out, i'll blog about it.

***

owh. the route to singapore has been cancelled. it is now.. destination: haatyai. can't wait!

***

well, i'm off to kuching now. see ya guys when i get back.

*hugs*kisses*

i/o!
destination:haatyai
go phuket!

going home

2006-10-06T23:36:00.000+08:00

looks like the starlight cinema at my place is gonna have to be postponed. i'm going to ipoh tomorrow, for the lantern festival. and flying back to kuching on sunday. (i'm sure someone is screaming happily hearing that)

sowie kengkawan. i have failed you *sob*sob*. the freddy krueger series x dijumpai. but i promise you, i'll try my best to get them.

ah. selamat bercuti!

*hugs*

ipoh, here i come!

kamu. are you reading this?

paris.

2006-10-06T23:10:00.000+08:00

my bestfriend is going to paris.

uarghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!

cemburu! cemburu! cemburu banget!

*hugs* echa.

we both dreamt about paris when we were like, what? 12? 13? and now you're going there. without me! ke manakah janji-janji manis mu? bahwa kita akan bersama-sama ke sana? bff kata mu! aku cemburu sama kamu!

sayang sama loe! tapi cemburu sich!!!

broken guitar

2006-10-06T06:14:00.000+08:00

do i get 7 years of bad luck for ruining a friend's guitar?

:(

sorry dude. tak sengaje.

the super villain was really a super villain. busuk ati!

guy+girl= imaginary friend

2006-10-05T21:48:00.000+08:00

guy: you look awfully ...
girl: i look awful?? (wtf?!)
guy: no no. i meant. YOU.LOOK.FAMILIAR!
girl: owh. yeah? i'm a rawksta. so maybe you've seen me on tv. heh.
guy: luct?
girl: mmu
guy: owh.
girl: yeah.
guy: so..
girl: so..
guy: where u headed?
girl: home. you?
guy: yeah home. so where do you live?
girl: planet dee. population:1. you?
guy: planet endry. population:2
girl: 2? aha. ic.
guy: yeah. endry & his imaginary friend
girl: hehehe. so what's endry's imaginary friend's name?
guy: x
girl: aha. okay! that's my place. see ya around?
guy: yea well, over there's mine. see ya!
girl: erm. yeah. daaaaaaaaaa~~~
guy: daaaa~~~

heh. n.i.c.e!

heart to heart

2006-10-05T21:22:00.000+08:00

ahh. had a heart to heart talk with mind.a.freak last night. location sangat menarek okay? kat hartamas. har.har.har.

it's true though. what is a friendship without a little misunderstanding?

what do they know, ay?

jumbled

2006-10-05T20:26:00.000+08:00

why is it almost impossible to find a freddy krueger movie? i went up and down sg wang plaza. went round and round. asked every single dvd guy at every shop. but still, the movies that i wanted are nowhere to be seen. m.i.a *sigh*

bt? erm. nobody is sharing old movies anymore. gosh. i really wanna watch them krueger movies!!

anyone knows where i can get them? or anyone has copies? urgh.

***

bukak pose with joen n cabi. heh. bitching time with your housemates about your other housemates is sangat.suke.okay? i mean, who else can joke about rm653 electriticy bills but us? heh.

i'd like to say 'world without strangers' is a kool concept. but most of the time, strangers could be a pain in the ass. no doubt. tambah2 lagi ngan pak arab. (i'm not a racist, but yes, that was a racist statement)

***

afiq has been persuading me to go shah alam. non stop. terase seperti sangat tertekan. i do wanna see him before flying back home. but i couldn't. or wouldn't. i dunno. *sigh* if only, ay?

***

i/o in november! kengkawan! stay alert!

***

mufi mereton!

ana tagged me!

2006-10-04T17:22:00.000+08:00

tq ana baizura for tagging me.

5 things i would do if i were a millionaire:
1. a millionaire? i would use that million to make my other millions.
2. nil
3. nil
4. nil
5. if i were a BILLIONAIRE, i'd build a castle in kuching, mansions all around europe, and a loft in manhattan. buy anything my family wants. i'd spend 5 years of my life travelling the world. buy disneyland. buy sony pictures. form the Diana Ambak Foundation. (cukup ke eh?)

5 bad habits:
1. lazy-ness. gotta get rid of that.
2. over-thinking.
3. incapable of hating (i consider that as a habit)
4. impulsive
5. moody (?)

5 things i hate doing:
1. waking up in the morning
2. pretending
3. cleaning up after someone else's mess
4. dealing with unintelligent people
5. dealing with morons

5 things i will never do:
1. a murder
2. betray my family
3. cheat on my boyfriend (har har har)
4. a threesome/a foursome of any of the +somes
5. jump off a building

5 things i've regret doing:
1. i have no regrets.

5 favourite toys/things:
1. my guess watches
2. my pdi tops & skirt
3. my NEW quicksilver belt
4. all of my adidas stuff
5. my laptop
(if only i have an ipod or a macbook to mention here *sigh*)

5 people i choose to do this:
(omg. i don't know who. will they do it if i put their names here? ampoon! tatau nak letak sape)
1. kojacky/kojackman from klt
2. shalin hani
3. dada
4. afiq
5. boy

chit chat

2006-10-04T16:44:00.000+08:00

i/o has been confirmed. anytime soon now.

***

last night's conversation with the crop master was..uhm..interesting. we talked about snuff films, sex change, and films. hehe. snuff films. sick, okay? sangat. and i couldn't believe my ears when the crop master actually said she wanted to watch the films again. ape kah? i've only seen it once, and i don't think that i would ever want to duduk n tengok sampah tuh ever again. macam, bodo n sangat inhuman. sangat kejam. ofey dear, you're kinda..sick! owh you will totally enjoy irreversible! gaspar noe is your new found besfriend!

it was last night that i decided to re-watch the freddy krueger films. i'm gonna get the dvds today, n host a freddy krueger marathon. i'll let you know when la eh..in this week la kot? n harap2 ari x ujan. starlight cinema @ townhouse rooftop!

owh. it's still too soon. i'm not him. i need time.

presentasi

2006-10-03T20:56:00.000+08:00

presentasi intership ku telah berjalan lancar.

seronok je tgk lekcerers sume eksaitet dgn presentasi ku. aku hebat ke ah? har.har.har

owh. starlight cinema kat townhouse rooftop telah dikensel oleh kerna ari ujan. di pospon ke ari laen. hopefully b4 sume org blah for semester break.

okeh my movie addict frens. aper2, gwe informi loe yah!

p/s: selamat yah kat sape2 yg present!

owh. i still do.

something creepy

2006-10-02T10:02:00.000+08:00

what do you get when you add ex girlfriend no. 1's name and ex girlfriend no. 2's name? a brand new girlfriend.

plain creepy.

mantoks~

2006-10-02T08:21:00.000+08:00

i'm really really sleepy right now. the slides and log book for my presentation are all done. i have to keep awake. have to. have to. please dee, don't fall asleep. elle's voice is like a chant (she's rehearsing for her presentation) heh. ofey's sailed away to dreamland. amy..well, i have no idea what amy is doing right now.

i'm staring at my bali photos. why owh why didn't i clean the lens before i left? every picture has finger prints smudges on them *sigh* sunset photos are all half ruined. urgh!

i hated the photos in my previous entry. beautiful, but they seemed naked without the white border that i always use. urgh. ngader je aku nih.

(9.07am: jgn tdo jgn tdo jgn tdo)

sneak peek

2006-10-02T01:41:00.000+08:00

un-edited version okay?

*sheesh*

i really should be doing my presentation. apa la!

photos

2006-10-02T00:54:00.000+08:00

i'm a little bz preparing for my internship presentation, so i'll upload my bali pictures in a few days' time.

saba ye!

puasa

2006-09-29T04:35:00.000+08:00

i love waking up for sahur and makan ngan kengkawan. teringat time kat hostel. and not to mention berbuka. gosh. the anticipation nak melantak tuh best giler.

i can get used to this. i think.

post-bali

2006-09-29T04:22:00.000+08:00

bali is the bomb! (i'm trying to be funny here, okay?)

ah. dee and her half naked hot surfer dudes. so what does that makes her? a hot surfer dudette? erm.

gosh. is it time to update my fotopages? or flickr?

maybe not eh?

N/A

2006-09-18T17:30:00.000+08:00

Diana Ambak is not available until further notice.

p/s: she is away in Bali for a holiday.

i/o

2006-09-18T17:29:00.000+08:00

moving out. moving in.

urgh. i hate moving. can't deal with the separation. with anything or anyone.

i love this blue room. i love this table. this chair. i'm in love with the aircond. i love the green screen. i love the masters' office. the iMacs. the cameras. the tripods. the mics.

i'm going to miss this third floor. sangat-sangat akan rindu. sangat-sangat sedih.

cleaning up

2006-09-18T17:10:00.000+08:00

!!

a lot of cleaning up to do!

pre-bali

2006-09-15T15:27:00.000+08:00

bali!

2006-09-14T16:23:00.000+08:00

bali is only a few days away. i can't believe i am actually going to bali! i've dreamed of going to bali for years and finally, it has come true, well, not yet, but it will.

kim had just came back from bali. she showed me her photos while she was there and i was like owhmygodowhmygodohmygod i can't wait! master.sam gave me some pointers of where to go and kim told me where to shop. she just came back from bali and she wants me to buy her stuff. how weird is that, huh? i'm so going to hard rock cafe, and get the shirt, so what the heck, ay?

i have been planning on where to go etc ever since the the flights and the hotel rooms were confirmed. but now, i'm not so sure anymore. six days is like, too damn short to go all over bali. *sigh* i've googled and read books, but still, i don't know where to go to. *urgh* need....more....time...

i want to visit all of the temples, all of the art markets, all of the tourist spots. i want to do everything there is to do in bali. i want to be more annoying than the arabs who visit kl every malaysian mega sale (or maybe not). i want to go bungey jumping, but uhm, it's us$62, so maybe not.

ah. there are just too many things to do. too many awesome places to go! owh owh i wanna meet aussie surfer dudes. i wanna be a surfer dudette. hmm maybe that's a little bit hard, because i can't swim, but nvm. my aussie surfer dudes are going to be more than willing to teach me. hah! crikey! (r.i.p steve)

i hope our hotel is going to be as good as they claimed to be *fingers+crossed* we paid rm 151 per night so they better be good!

owh. i hope airasia wont fuck up this time.

the past three days.

2006-09-14T11:26:00.000+08:00

okay.

my blog was gone for a few days. lost in cyberspace. i don't know how, or when, or who did it. i don't know whether it was hacked or blogspot fucked up.

master.sam was right. maybe it's time for me to get my own domain. yeah. maybe it's time.

***

i spent the last two days in corus hotel. i yawned and yawned throughout the two days. spending time with the economics society is totally not my thing. i had no idea what they were talking about..and not paying intention didn't help at all. heh. i was too indulged in my book. (i only brought the book on the second day of the conference. the first day was !!!!!)

it was only until i had to sit down and listen to the interview with the indonesian delegates that i understood the whole point of the conference. and it was only then that i realised the importance of the fta. if i hadn't sat there for 17 minutes, i wouldn't have known. *phew!*

imagine sitting throughout the two days of the conference and not knowing what it was all about. hehe. *blushed*

owh. the new camera kicks ass!

this.is.weird

2006-09-14T11:22:00.000+08:00

fucked up, man.

it's fucked up.

everything's fucked up!

updating!

2006-09-11T16:29:00.000+08:00

updating this. updating that.

yahoo messenger. check!
cellphone. check!

owh my. i still have the late amin's number. god. rest in peace, amin.

what else is there to update?

phew! i'm wayyyy behind. gotta lot of catching ups to do.

let's keep updating!

9/11

2006-09-11T13:58:00.000+08:00

not that it matters, but i just remembered, today is september 11.

it's my bestfriend's 24th birthday.

har.har.har

happy 24th echa!

*hugs*kisses*

\:guilty:\

2006-09-11T11:09:00.000+08:00

'i wish i could stay but you argue'

that's a line from coheed & cambria's wake up. a good friend of mine played the song non stop over the weekend. it's a sad song. kinda sums up what i am feeling right now.

these past few months has been an emotional ride for me. i was left hanging, without given any explanations. i was bitter. all i wanted was a closure. he was reluctant to give me what i wanted. a closure. but finally he did. after almost two months. (!) well, better late than never, right?

during the (almost) two months, i kept asking myself 'what did i do wrong?' 'what didn't i do?' 'why cant he see that i am the one for him?' 'why cant he see the fact that we are so damn good together?'

every single day i question myself of why he stopped loving me. there wasn't a day that i didn't think of him. i tried hating him, but i couldn't. how could i hate the man that i once admire? worship? love? i couldn't. what we once had meant so much for me.

he taught me how to really be in love. he taught me that i, too, could be owh-sickly-lovey-dovey. heh. he changed me. i gave him something that i had never given anyone before. my 100%. i went all out with him.

i am not angry. i am not bitter. i do not hate. not anymore. i had a revelation. heh.

it is his lost for letting me go. it's good for him to have a brand new *shining effect* girlfriend. a girlfriend who 'understands me better'. a girlfriend who could always be by his side, smiling, cheering him, not provoking him, not pushing him, not pressuring him. it's good for him. they deserve each other. and i, as the other ex girlfriend once said, deserves better.

ah crap. it wasn't him who couldn't see that i was the one for him. it was me who couldn't see that he was not the one for me. it was me who couldn't see that no matter how hard i try, i never could satisfy his needs. why not? because he is who he is!

when he asked me 'do you regret of knowing me?' i said no. if he had asked me 'do you regret of loving me?' i would've said no. but i do regret of what he had done. i regret of his actions. regret of knowing that a sweet man like him could have done the things that he did. but no, i don't regret of knowing or loving him.

things will never be the same. i can never be friends with him again. this is what happens when two friends fall in love and out of love. their friendship ends. sad, isn't it? before he left the other day, he said 'see you around'. i smiled. no you silly guy, i won't be seeing you around anymore. i wouldn't want to make things complicated for me. heh.

well, it's really over. i can smoke again. i can drink again. i can do weed again! hah! i can do whatever-the-fuck-that-i-want-to again! ah that is the life! har.har.har.

ok ok. all the best for the both of you. awak, you better hold on to this girl. macam yang awak cakap, dia paham awak. x macam saye, xleh nk paham awak, kan? so you better treat her right. jangan buat dia cam awak buat saye. good luck to the both you! and ingat, kalo kawen, don't bother to invite me. :D girl, good luck.

so here i am doing what the other ex girlfriend had already done. i'm closing this chapter of my life. been there and done that. now it's over. let's move on to the next chapter.

'love is what's left when being in love has gone. it's when you care about someone and you hope they're happy, but you're not under illusions about them. maybe that kind of love is not exciting and passionate and all those things that fade with time. all those things that you're so keen on. but in the end, it's the only kind of love that really matters' -gina to harry. +man & boy- tony parsons+.

my master, the master.

2006-09-08T17:27:00.000+08:00

our dearest master.jerry's blog has been hacked again. for the 12th time! and it's always by the same hacker.

12 times! it shows how much free time this loser has. and how dedicated he/she is. lol. if only he/she concerntrates more on his/her own life rather than making other people's life complicated.

"time to act. in 24 hours, jeremiahfoo.com shall reveal a shocking tale of deceit, slander, lies and the truth"

you go, boss!

ramli sarip.

2006-09-08T17:07:00.001+08:00

mau nonton ramli sarip bersame-same kengkawan kat kltower.

okay. to syuk or to shuk?

lol.